Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Only Thirty Days Behind!

Time to buy some food
And chip away at the bills.
Gotta love PAYDAY!

Who dug those deep holes
Right behind my grey garage?
It was an opossum.

Not something I do
Darts was surprisingly fun
A rare guys night out.

Up early, eat fast
The summer is now over.
Back to school with you!

Matthew: Middle school
Joshua is in high school
I don’t feel too old.

I had a spare pint
So I let them stick my arm
And drain out warm life.

A very warm day,
For the summer could this be
The last slip and slide?

I have a secret:
That when it comes to web logs
I have another.

Feeling very foul
Depressed, alone; Been a while
I wish I knew why.

Perhaps I am down
And grouchy because I have
One more week of third.

The Amish are here!
They showed up at my office
To tear down a wall.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Filling in the Gaps

My brother and I
I wish we were much closer
Happy Birthday, Chris.

Coffee in the morn
Is a simple joy of life
Learn to relish it.

In my last haiku
I was unclear. Do not put
Relish in your drink

If I could make time
I would spend it with my wife
Laughing, talking, RRRAAWR!

I like weird music
It seems to reflect my mind
Sounds normal to me

Where is everyone?
My coworkers are now late
Oh wait, it’s Sunday.

Barry’s intestines
Appear to have exploded.
I now work at night.

Working the night shift
Has a few nice benefits:
Weekend starts at noon.

There is a reason
And I don’t know what it is.
Things happen worldwide.

Working on Sunday
For just a few hours let’s me
Sleep in until six.

At six in the morn
There is almost no traffic
Bike ride into work!

8/17/2010“Joe Satriani”
Is the kind of name that has
All five syllables.

I injured my foot
Riding my bike. It seems that
My shoes are worn out.

The first week of nights
Is nearing its wretched end.
Get well soon, Barry.

Thursday, September 16, 2010


Excuse me, dear sir
But could I kindly ask you
To stop kicking me?

This day is taking
Far more than its rightful share
Of sweet work day hours.

Where did I misplace
That thing I was just holding?
It was oozing grease.

That Martin Luther
Was a very fine old man
Face washed – frying pan.

Seven more minutes
Until I can return home
And my wife hugs me.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Haiku 4 U

She fell off the bed
Sleeping just like a opossum
Tessa’s bloody nose.

I sure love my wife
But do not tell her enough.
I’ll write her love poems.

If I were a doc
You could pay me in fresh eggs
I’d still make house calls.

Man, it’s loud in here
This used to be an airport
Stop the drum machine.

John Linnell is fixed
His brain problem is addressed
His music suffers.

It sure has been nice
Not being depressed lately
Thank you, Great Doctor.

Gold is on the rise
The economy stinks bad.
Could Glen Beck be right?

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Mean Grownups

We called them the Alley-Oops. They were named after the Alley-Oops of my childhood which were named by a friend of my older brother after the 50s novelty song. And now they are gone.

The Alley-Oops were a set of bmx-style jumps and ramps and dips that were about a mile east on the River Greenway off North Anthony. Often it would be a destination on bike trips with my kids, though we didn't dare try the more impressive set where the top of the ramp to the bottom of the gulch would be six feet or more with ten feet between the massive dirt mounds. Rather we would take the easier circuit where you could easily coast over one foot mounds without getting air or even chicken out and take the trail to either side of the small training mounds.

But the big circuits... they were impressive! Often we would watch as greasy biker kids would take turns tempting fate on this frightening jumps... usually without helmets or pads. The most impressive thing, however, is that these incredible interloping circuits were created by these kids, or possibly generations of pre-teen and teens. I'd see them out there with shovels, repairing a mound or making a new one. I wish we had the foresight to take pictures. Seriously, these would easily rank in the Seven Wonders of the Kid-dom World.

And now, like I said, they are gone. We hadn't visited them this summer because that part of the River Greenway was closed off due to construction further down the line. Now the "entrance" is chained off, the ramps bulldozed to fill the gulches, and nasty little shrubberies have been planted all over. It's sad, really. These kids, who would normally be written off as losers or wastoids or slackers put in sweat and time to create sometime truly impressive, something that was theirs. Until some bureaucrat decided that it was a legal risk continuing to turn a blind eye. Yes, I blame the lawyers. Now what are these "at-risk" kids to do? Go play some more video games? Loiter outside the Quickie-Mart? Train for the Olympics?

It reminds me of something I read in an old Reader's Digest. It seems in this town there was a pipe that went over a creek. The problem was that the kids kept walking over the pipe and breaking it, causing no end of problems. The town tried many things to keep the kids off the pipe but those pesky kids continued to play on the pipe. At one town meeting the various methods were being discussed on how to keep the kids away from the pipe until some old geezer stood up and said "Why don't we support the pipe so it won't break?" Sure, that wouldn't fly in todays world, which is a sad shame, but really, how much of a grumpy old gus do you need to be to take away a kids playground?

'Tis truly a sad day.