Blame It On Miss Rigby

 

Blame it on that spinster Eleanor Rigby, but I’ve loved the sound of a cello for as long as I can remember.  In my late twenties, after learning how to play the electric bass, I really wanted to buy a cello for my thirtieth birthday.  However that was very early in the internet days so all I could find were cellos around $1200, both locally and online (Stringworks… why do you still tempt me so?) and so no cello.

One day, when I was a spry young lad in my early forties, I saw a guy play an electric cello at church.  Hmmmm….  I found the same cello online for a mere $300.  Now that’s a price I could take a chance on! 

In 1995 I learned the bass guitar on my own, messing around and figuring things out.  Again, this was before free lessons were everywhere on YouTube and I knew so little that I had to even ask I guy I knew how to change the strings.  There wasn’t much in the way of cello instruction on YouTube in 2015 either, so I mucked around in my usual way and made a few sounds.  I was able to get a decent sound if I wanted a simple, rough rhythm part on a recording (with lots of attempts and lots of editing) but I was far away from being able to play any kind of melody. 

But mostly the cello sat in a corner, making me feel only slightly guilty.

When covid hit and we were all sent home, I decided to practice it five minutes a day.  This went on for a week and I thought I was doing well until I watched some instructional videos and found that I was holding the bow wrong, that I was sitting wrong, that I was wrong Wrong WRONG!  I tried the “correct” methods and they didn’t feel right and it wasn’t long before that cello was back in the corner.  During this time, though, I did play it once at church, using my small bag of tricks and limited note ability for all they were worth.  There’s nothing like the prospect of public humiliation to make one practice.  I probably put in an entire hour of practice for that three minute song.

Last April I decided to stop sucking so much on the electric guitar and to buy a year of Tim Pierce’s online guitar lessons.  I started strong for a few months, slowed way down for a few, and then got my second wind, ending strong.  It really did make a difference!  Although I’m years away from being a real guitarist I’m light years ahead of where I was.

The “second wind” coincided with a video of a classical pianist who learned the guitar in a month.  She shared that although the style and techniques were different, the practice habits were the same for both.  One thing she shared is that it’s important to practice every day, even if it’s just ten minutes. 

A second habit I started was based on finding that someone’s dad used to pay him a nickel for every minute they practiced as a kid.  Sure, it’s only three bucks an hour but it’s a reward system that I could use to buy more guitar gear… guilt free because I earned it!

Somewhere during the last few months I decided that after the guitar lesson subscription ended that I would put my new-found practice habits to use on learning the cello.  May 2025 was going to be CELLO MONTH!

Let me first say that cello is waaaay more difficult than bass guitar.  Even getting a decent non-squeaky tone is a challenge.  It's now May 23 and so far I have practiced every single day, usually for twenty-five minutes but sometimes only ten.  The thing is that I’m showing up and working at it.  Being the dork that I am, it’s all on a spreadsheet… 508 minutes so far!  That’s nearly eight and a half hours (and $25)!  Wow!  I should HOPE that I’m improving!  My end goal is to be able to play the cello part from Eleanor Rigby as well as a cello part I wrote for a song.  There’s only about a week left and I don’t think I’ll be fluid enough to play either, but I’ll probably continue into June. 

Watch out, Yo Yo Ma!

 

 

 

 

friEND Update

It’s been a year since my last post, and also at least a year since I gave up on the “finding a local friend” thing.  And I can still honestly say that Since I Gave Up Hope, I Feel A Lot Better. (Thanks Steve… I know that’s not what you meant but the shoe fits).  There is still liberation in my withdrawal from society.

I realized that when I was a pre-teenager I spent most of my time alone doing creative stuff.  During my teen and very early 20s I had some friend time, mostly creating music or videos, but even then I would need alone time after.  Overall it seems that now when I have some free time, I’d rather spend it with my family or alone doing things I love instead of putting effort into trying to make guy friends.  I am fully embracing my lonerism… it’s best to lean into your strengths!

I think the dad-band played two, maybe three times in the past year.  If I can’t remember then that’s telling.  The first time was after an eight month break and was decent, possibly due to there only being the new guitarist.  The most recent was not so “decent” and I couldn’t wait to get out of there.  The previously absent guitarist is going deaf and blasted his amp right at me.  I asked him to move it and he did but it’s a small space so there isn’t much room for movement.  I would have asked him to turn it down but that’s just not rock ‘n’ roll!  Also both guitarists had loud hums in their amps, which isn’t normal but also didn’t add to the evening.  As a contrast, when I play bass or guitar along with recordings by myself in the basement, I come upstairs energized and refreshed.  I’m giving it time to make sure before I make the call, but it might be time for that season to end.  As it stands, I handed the reigns over to Mike a year ago so it’s up to him to put in the time to get us together so I’m sitting back to see how I feel when it finally happens, which due to his job will be at least another month.  Maybe my ear drums will have recovered by then.

Also in the area of the loner, in that past I’ve made intentional attempts to talk to guys at church, introducing myself and trying to make conversation.  Looking back at their reactions, it’s obvious no one was interested and they just wanted to go through the paces of church and leave.  So now at this new church, I don’t even try.  “Good morning” and a handshake during the brief meet and greet, walk in, walk out without trying to meet anyone, just like everyone else.  Church is supposed to be community?  Maybe for some.  As for me, nothing ventured, nothing lost.  And I actually like not having the difficulty of social interaction.

In the realm of work, there were three guys that I would occasionally swing by their office and chat with.  One is my age and the other two are quite a bit younger but have similar interests.  In all this time, none of them have ever initiated a conversation so I’m getting the hint and dropping that. 

I guess I’m not good at doing the friendship thing.  It takes effort and this well has done gone dry.  Why continue beating my head on a brick wall?  Hard like a stone.  A little contact every month or so and I’m good (Hey, Adam!  I really do appreciate you and am happy for you!).  I’m just not a “hanging out” kind of guy but felt like I should try because, you know, Christian fellowship. I don't feel that way any more.