Tuesday, July 28, 2009

News From the Front

Days three and four:

It's been quiet. Too quiet. If I sit still long enough I can see them growing, soaking up the sunshine, mustering up the courage to turn red, perhaps coordinating with their siblings and cousins on when to make the attack. There are dozens of them.

In the meanwhile an unexpected attack has come from the bell peppers. Two... three... FOUR of the monsters demanding to be picked before they turn bad. Stuffed peppers for dinner tonight? Oh, they'd like that, I'm sure.

We've also managed to stave off two assaults from the Bushbean Corps. This year not only are they coming at us in green but also in yellow... just as dangerous, just as tasty. The children won't touch these yellow beans which laughingly leaves more for my wife and I. That wife of mine (as well as the baby) loves fresh beans so I doubt we'll have trouble keeping up but still I worry because also new this year is four stands of pole beans. Already they've crested their seven-foot poles, reaching higher still. Some of them seem to be reaching for the phone line about two feet above them. It's an insidious plan, taking out our communication line to the outside world. I'll have to keep my eyes on them. So far these vertical devils haven't done more than put out a few flowers but they are notorious for later production. I fear they will hit us hard after our culinary defenses have been tired out by the Bushbean Corps. There's always blanching and freezing but it's not the same.

2 comments:

Elephantschild said...

My battlefield seems rather bereft of troops this year. Perhaps some of yours would consider parachuting in?

A mission of mercy, as it were.

Big Doofus (Roger) said...

Watch out for those darn beans. They will get into your phone lines, then the Interwebs and then your TV. Soon you will only be able to watch reruns of Barney Miller and commercials that feature the many talents of Wilford Brimley.