Let’s see if I can piece this all together… it was clear as a bell two days ago when I was doing the dishes…
During my morning devotions (which unfortunately only happen on weekends or days I don’t work) I was struck with the thought of being peeled down to nothing. Earlier I had been reminded that a bad investment was worth about a quarter of what it would be if I had left it alone. From buying houses in the country to moving things in my 401k, I have a history of making bad financial decisions because I, Mr. Smart Guy, am going to outsmart the system instead of investing like all the experts say. After all, this other expert is saying contrarian things and well, I’m a contrarian. Anyway, so I’m wondering how stressed I’m going to be when all our savings are depleted by regular living expenses and I’ll have to start racking up debt on a credit card or stop paying certain bills* and I was reminded of a bit in the biography of Mr. Edward Fudge where they would often need a certain amount to meet their expenses for that month and a check would arrive for just that amount. No more. No less. That just stresses me out… I need some cushion. I mean NEED. Right now we have that cushion but it’s being chipped away at and will be gone in about 18 months, at the current rate. And it’s not like we’re all using iPhones or eating steak for dinner or even going out to eat on a regular basis. For me a treat is some Edy’s ice cream (instead of store brand) that I got on sale for $2.99.
So I’m wondering if that’s what God is up to, taking away my cushion so I’ll rely on Him more. Then in Sunday School the leader talks about when he and his wife were starting their business how sometimes they would need thirty-two dollars and five cents to pay their bills for the month and they would get a check for $32.05. Uh oh. I don’t like the sound of this.
It’s not like God and I have been super close lately. Truth be told, I’m kinda tired of the whole “Christians” thing. I’m burned out and I’ve been burned. I mean, you ask for good Christian friends for your kids and get nada. That’s not a selfish thing to ask. Or how about someone for my wife and myself? I mean, a coal set apart from other coals will soon go out. You need other coals to feed on each other. I’m here to tell you that I’m all but out. I don’t even think there’s much smoldering going on. So yeah, I’m kinda ticked. At God for not providing other coal in my life? Yeah, a bit. At “the church” for not providing support? Yeah, a bit more. At myself because I’m the common denominator so I either must suck, be a jerk no one wants to be around, or don’t know how to be friends? Yeah, a lot more. So with my near future involving having even less money/security than I do now and no other coals in sight it’s pretty easy to just want to give up. Gee…. What’s it like to feel like giving up and having a group of men rally around you for encouragement?
And I say this knowing that there are at least two guys who would reach out to me. Two isn’t bad, right? I mean, surely I’m just having a pity party. So while doing dishes that afternoon and listening to an old Rich Mullins album on headphones the idea came to me that I should go back and listen to all my Phil Keaggy albums and all my Rich Mullins albums. These are ones I consider foundational when my faith was new. And there's just something honest and refreshing about their music. So I think I’ll do that and see if some hope sparks up in me.
There is a bit more. That night one daughter had a two your choir practice and the other two had one hour. So I’m there for the first pickup and there’s a guy in the hallway that sometimes shows up for the Wednesday night Bible study. I’ve talked with him once, maybe twice. He doesn’t acknowledge me in the hallway and so, feeling even more down, I just move to the end of the hallway, away from people, and wait. Then another guy comes around the corner. I’ve talked to him a few times while waiting for kids to come out of choir. But I’m just going to keep to myself. Amazingly enough, he greets me and we talk a bit. Okay God, whatever. And then at the second pickup a different guy, also an occasional attendee at the Bible study, comes up and talks. WHY WON’T YOU LET ME HAVE THIS PITY PARTY?!? It wasn’t even a deep, full-fledged one, just a little bit of gloom. Well, at least I’m back to a 5 out of 10, emotion-wise. Not happy, not sad. I just am and I guess that’s okay.
* Although currently we have no existing debt and pay off our credit cards in full each month even if it means cashing in savings, which I don’t like.
Tuesday, April 16, 2019
April Financial Post
It’s been a bit so I thought I’d regurgitate my financial life at the moment. Feel free to not read this… it’s more for me than for rest of the universe.
Right now I’m waiting for a massive check from a 401k loan to clear so that I can pay for adult things. Apparently if you deposit a check over $200 they only give you $200 and hold the rest for a couple of business days. If it’s over $5000 you have to wait SEVEN BUSINESS DAYS before you get anything over the five grand. This is 2019, mind you, and it wasn’t this way even a few years ago. So even though it is my money and came from my 401k I am not allowed to instantly buy my wife a new(er) van until next Wednesday. And then, lucky me, I get her 2004 Odyssey with 204,000 miles on it so that I can trickle 3,000 miles a year on it going to and from work and little else. But also lucky me because I get to sell the bloated 2002 Chevy Express 3500 15 passenger van that I’ve been driving for the past year. I don’t care for the big white whale, but it has been a blessing. It was offered to us by the Living Faith country church we used to attend back when we lived in the country. They once had a very active youth ministry and used the van to bring kids in from Ossian, about six miles away. When it was offered to us this aged beast only had 50,000 miles on it and had been meticulously cared for. And the price they wanted for it was in the “very good” range. In the homeschool community it’s a badge of honor to own one of these massive vehicles so the intent was that my wife would drive it. However it’s horrible to park, you can’t hear the kids if they’re too far back, and once, while I was driving it to work, I went around the corner on a snow-covered road in our neighborhood and this rear-wheel vehicle did a 180. It was terrifying and a little bit fun. I’m still thankful that there were no cars coming the other way or parked on the side of the street. Like I said, it’s been a tank and has had no problems and I’m very hopeful that we’ll be able to sell it for what we paid for it. But first, a few words to my future self as a reminder of this guzzler. Yes, guzzler. It has a thirty gallon gas tank, which means I only have to fill it up once a month. It gets eleven miles to the gallon and the “low gas” light doesn’t work so I have to reset the counter with every fill-up and when I get to around 288 miles I know I need to find a gas station soon. And I also need to bring a book. It takes a good long time to pump thirty gallons of gas. One of the reasons my wife wanted the van was because our Honda was plum full of our own kids so if they wanted to have any friends over, well, the law just doesn’t allow kids to lay on the floor of the van. Plus it’s rare that people are allowed over at our house because it needs to be excruciatingly clean or else my wife is nervous about even kids being there. So we needed the van maybe twice? Wait, there was a week when she watched some ladies kids and had to take them to school in the morning. I think driving the white whale for that week cemented how much she didn’t like driving it, even though initially she liked that it reminded her of driving her dad’s truck. So soon it will be gone… fingers crossed.
In order to take out that super-huge 401k loan I had to use our federal tax refund to pay off one of the two existing 401k loans because you can only have two loans out at a time. The rest of the super-huge 401k loan will be used to pay for a new roof, something I knew would be happening when we bought the house. In fact, the underwriter made me get something in writing from a roofer stating that the existing roof would last for five years. Riiiiight. Because one of the two 401k loans were taken because of having to buy a house so soon after buying a house (the pig issue) I knew I wouldn’t have the money right away for a roof so I nursed it along with roofing tar/patching stuff for the past few years.
Here’s the financial juggling I’m currently in the middle of:
1) Take federal tax refund to pay off 401k loan #1
2) Take out super-huge 401k loan a.k.a #3
3) Buy a new roof (putting 50% down today)
4) Buy a newer van (in the next week)
5) Sell the big white van (mid-April)
6) Use the money from the sale of the big white van to pay off 401k loan #2 so that our monthly repayment amounts are still the same
Did I miss anything? Well, this latest 401k loan will be paid off in five years when I’m the ripe old age of 53. At least Tessa won’t be driving by then but there’s a good chance either Brooke or Lyndi will be married and I’ll be a grandparent.
Note: It's April 26 and I'm mailing out the check for step #6. It is finished.
Right now I’m waiting for a massive check from a 401k loan to clear so that I can pay for adult things. Apparently if you deposit a check over $200 they only give you $200 and hold the rest for a couple of business days. If it’s over $5000 you have to wait SEVEN BUSINESS DAYS before you get anything over the five grand. This is 2019, mind you, and it wasn’t this way even a few years ago. So even though it is my money and came from my 401k I am not allowed to instantly buy my wife a new(er) van until next Wednesday. And then, lucky me, I get her 2004 Odyssey with 204,000 miles on it so that I can trickle 3,000 miles a year on it going to and from work and little else. But also lucky me because I get to sell the bloated 2002 Chevy Express 3500 15 passenger van that I’ve been driving for the past year. I don’t care for the big white whale, but it has been a blessing. It was offered to us by the Living Faith country church we used to attend back when we lived in the country. They once had a very active youth ministry and used the van to bring kids in from Ossian, about six miles away. When it was offered to us this aged beast only had 50,000 miles on it and had been meticulously cared for. And the price they wanted for it was in the “very good” range. In the homeschool community it’s a badge of honor to own one of these massive vehicles so the intent was that my wife would drive it. However it’s horrible to park, you can’t hear the kids if they’re too far back, and once, while I was driving it to work, I went around the corner on a snow-covered road in our neighborhood and this rear-wheel vehicle did a 180. It was terrifying and a little bit fun. I’m still thankful that there were no cars coming the other way or parked on the side of the street. Like I said, it’s been a tank and has had no problems and I’m very hopeful that we’ll be able to sell it for what we paid for it. But first, a few words to my future self as a reminder of this guzzler. Yes, guzzler. It has a thirty gallon gas tank, which means I only have to fill it up once a month. It gets eleven miles to the gallon and the “low gas” light doesn’t work so I have to reset the counter with every fill-up and when I get to around 288 miles I know I need to find a gas station soon. And I also need to bring a book. It takes a good long time to pump thirty gallons of gas. One of the reasons my wife wanted the van was because our Honda was plum full of our own kids so if they wanted to have any friends over, well, the law just doesn’t allow kids to lay on the floor of the van. Plus it’s rare that people are allowed over at our house because it needs to be excruciatingly clean or else my wife is nervous about even kids being there. So we needed the van maybe twice? Wait, there was a week when she watched some ladies kids and had to take them to school in the morning. I think driving the white whale for that week cemented how much she didn’t like driving it, even though initially she liked that it reminded her of driving her dad’s truck. So soon it will be gone… fingers crossed.
In order to take out that super-huge 401k loan I had to use our federal tax refund to pay off one of the two existing 401k loans because you can only have two loans out at a time. The rest of the super-huge 401k loan will be used to pay for a new roof, something I knew would be happening when we bought the house. In fact, the underwriter made me get something in writing from a roofer stating that the existing roof would last for five years. Riiiiight. Because one of the two 401k loans were taken because of having to buy a house so soon after buying a house (the pig issue) I knew I wouldn’t have the money right away for a roof so I nursed it along with roofing tar/patching stuff for the past few years.
Here’s the financial juggling I’m currently in the middle of:
1) Take federal tax refund to pay off 401k loan #1
2) Take out super-huge 401k loan a.k.a #3
3) Buy a new roof (putting 50% down today)
4) Buy a newer van (in the next week)
5) Sell the big white van (mid-April)
6) Use the money from the sale of the big white van to pay off 401k loan #2 so that our monthly repayment amounts are still the same
Did I miss anything? Well, this latest 401k loan will be paid off in five years when I’m the ripe old age of 53. At least Tessa won’t be driving by then but there’s a good chance either Brooke or Lyndi will be married and I’ll be a grandparent.
Note: It's April 26 and I'm mailing out the check for step #6. It is finished.
Thursday, April 11, 2019
The Anti-Blah Post
Because most (or all) of my posts lately have been downcast, here's a post full of the good things in my life, in no specific order:
I have a stable job that lets me work indoors even when it's cold and it pays me enough that I only fall behind slightly on my bills each month.
Our house will be getting a new roof in the next week or so.
I'm not diabetic. Yet.
My wife is beautiful and when we get to spend time together and we aren't exhausted we have fun. We have still have fun when we're exhausted but it's more of a tired fun.
My older kids are doing well in their jobs and my younger kids are doing well in their lives.
I'm close to finishing the guitar I've been building since last fall.
My right foot is only a little stiff.
Hopefully by the end of the weekend I'll have painted the last bedroom that needs it currently.
I haven't spent a single night of my life in jail.
That's good enough for now.
I have a stable job that lets me work indoors even when it's cold and it pays me enough that I only fall behind slightly on my bills each month.
Our house will be getting a new roof in the next week or so.
I'm not diabetic. Yet.
My wife is beautiful and when we get to spend time together and we aren't exhausted we have fun. We have still have fun when we're exhausted but it's more of a tired fun.
My older kids are doing well in their jobs and my younger kids are doing well in their lives.
I'm close to finishing the guitar I've been building since last fall.
My right foot is only a little stiff.
Hopefully by the end of the weekend I'll have painted the last bedroom that needs it currently.
I haven't spent a single night of my life in jail.
That's good enough for now.
Wind and Wave
-They Might Be Giants-
It started on Monday. Last fall I put an ad in Craigslist about forming a dad band, or rather just trying to find some similarly-aged Christian men who would want to get together and play music every month or so. It took three months but eventually this time one of the responders had a setup in his basement. We’ve gotten together three times, with the second Monday of the month being the designated day. So far there isn’t a lot of gelling or common ground musically but it’s been good for me to be out of the house and to be around other guys. However this past Monday the host had to cancel this months meeting because he was getting new windows and his house is a wreck. Disappointment.
The second and bigger issue is a men’s Bible study I’ve been attending since the beginning of the year. My kids go to a different churches Wednesday night kids ministry (because our “church” is lame-o) and I decided to crash the Bible study that was going on at the same time. I don’t go to that church and didn’t know anyone there buy hey, why not? So I’ve been going and it’s been pretty good, at times bordering on great. Although I’m sure it’s all in my imagination but it seemed like three weeks ago there was a breakthrough, with guys admitting they didn’t have friends and one or two even admitting that the reason they were there was to find friends. So I dared to be hopeful, even though it seemed to me that these guys “who had no friends” sure seemed to be talking a lot to other guys in the group as if they were friends. Still… The following week was a Kids Club skating party but the mens group was still going to meet, for those without small kids. My kids wanted to go skating and then backed out too late for me to attend. Then the following week was Spring Break so no one met.
Which brings me to this week. I was cautiously hopeful that some of that honesty would persist after three weeks and was looking forward to once again being in a room of guys. We even got to the church early, which almost never happens. So I get the kids registered and go to drop off my youngest, who is four. What? Didn’t you know that tonight is their big Easter Kids Club celebration and that parents of kids five and under were to stay with their kids because there were activities that the parents had to help with. Oh. So I guess that means no Bible study for me. Serves me right for actually being foolish enough to anticipate something. But we had fun and I’m sure it’s a memory I’ll carry with me until my memory fails, which will probably be next August.
While waiting in the hall to enter the room of yonder event another guy from the Bible study lined up with his kids. Why not? So I made small talk and asked him about his spring break. He was friendly and we had a nice, brief chat but it was one sided. Then they opened up the room and my daughter wanted to sit at a table with a young girl her age. Sure, why not. I tried to talk to the dad but they didn’t go to the church and he wanted nothing to do with me. I’m used to that. At the table right next to us was the dad I had talked to in the hallway and two more dads from the Bible study and their kids, including one guy who homeschools but has less than zero interest in talking to me. I tried a little to be a part of their conversation, seeing as it was right next to us, but they were all into each other and so I gave up. Strike out! I'm sensing a common denominator in all these failures and it's me.
Now I’m back to ennui. I’ll go to few the remaining Bible studies before summer break but I’m not hopeful. And I probably won’t go back next fall. I’ll have tried to join their club for ten or twelve times by that point and I’m not one to keep beating my head against a brick wall. But who knows… probably by the time fall rolls around I might be willing to risk another round of rejection and will try again.
Thursday, March 7, 2019
At It Again
I have to confess… I’ve been trying to make male friends again.
I know it’s a fool’s task and I’m bound to get disappointed but there’s just something masochistic in me that likes basking in the warm glow of rejection. I suppose things would be easier if I knew how to relate to others, or wanted to try for friends more than about 15% of the time (with the rest of the time being in a “why bother” mode).
So here’s what this fool is doing. First off I’ve met twice with some guys to play music. I met them on Craigslist and didn’t get killed in some basement at the initial meet up. I guess not many people get killed in basements in la-tee-dah Pine Valley. The first time it was just the one guy and myself and we flubbered around some songs where only one of us knew the songs and eventually we just played praise songs. Hey, at least I got out of the house for an evening. The second time we were joined by a drummer and a young –pup guitarist (I think he was early thirties). This worked out a little better but we still don’t really have much of a common musical grounding. Not like when I went to my ol’ high school pal Rogers house in January. That was nice, not having to explain bands or music.
“Ya wanna play this song by The Choir?” “Sure! I love that song!”
Versus
“Have you ever heard of a band named The Choir? No? How about Adam Again? Okay, here’s an easy one: Phil Keaggy. You ARE almost fifty and have been a Christian for longer than three years, right? Okay, how about The Newsboys. Really? You haven’t even heard of The Newsboys? Rich Mullins? Now you’re pulling my leg. No?
So we’ve played twice and the idea is to get together the second Monday of every month, which is just around the corner and we still don’t have any new songs picked out. I guess we’ll play “Wrap It Up” for an hour.
My second attempt is even crazier: I’m crashing a men’s Bible study at a church where we don’t attend. Our own “church” is pretty much a lame-o worship center (“If you want fellowship you do it in our own small group but keep that crap outta this building”) but we go there for complicated reasons. However my kids have choir and go to the mid-week Kidz Club (or whatever it’s called) at a different church where I drop them off at 6:45 and pick them back up at 8:00. I supposed I could drive home and back again during that time or patronize a bar but I’ve been kicked out of every bar in the tri-state area for telling lame dad jokes so that’s not an option. I had been seeing a room full of guys when I dropped off my kids so after Christmas I decided that I would interject myself into their club. And there’s nothing they can do to stop me! BWA! HA! HA!
So far I’ve attended eight classes and I think there about about ten more until summer. Because my wife found a statistic somewhere that it takes adult males 10-12 interactions of being around each other before any kind of friendship forms I figure I’m already two-thirds of the way to disappointment. I try to talk to at least one other guy each week but so far it’s not like anyone is approaching me after the study ends. There’s a core group of five or six that are there each week (which I guess includes myself) and an additional roving cast of ten or so who may or may not show up. It’s pretty obvious everyone knows everyone else and they all go to this church (big surprise there). It’s a decent sized church with two services so maybe they think I go to a different service than the one they attend. Maybe.
I know it’s a fool’s task and I’m bound to get disappointed but there’s just something masochistic in me that likes basking in the warm glow of rejection. I suppose things would be easier if I knew how to relate to others, or wanted to try for friends more than about 15% of the time (with the rest of the time being in a “why bother” mode).
So here’s what this fool is doing. First off I’ve met twice with some guys to play music. I met them on Craigslist and didn’t get killed in some basement at the initial meet up. I guess not many people get killed in basements in la-tee-dah Pine Valley. The first time it was just the one guy and myself and we flubbered around some songs where only one of us knew the songs and eventually we just played praise songs. Hey, at least I got out of the house for an evening. The second time we were joined by a drummer and a young –pup guitarist (I think he was early thirties). This worked out a little better but we still don’t really have much of a common musical grounding. Not like when I went to my ol’ high school pal Rogers house in January. That was nice, not having to explain bands or music.
“Ya wanna play this song by The Choir?” “Sure! I love that song!”
Versus
“Have you ever heard of a band named The Choir? No? How about Adam Again? Okay, here’s an easy one: Phil Keaggy. You ARE almost fifty and have been a Christian for longer than three years, right? Okay, how about The Newsboys. Really? You haven’t even heard of The Newsboys? Rich Mullins? Now you’re pulling my leg. No?
So we’ve played twice and the idea is to get together the second Monday of every month, which is just around the corner and we still don’t have any new songs picked out. I guess we’ll play “Wrap It Up” for an hour.
My second attempt is even crazier: I’m crashing a men’s Bible study at a church where we don’t attend. Our own “church” is pretty much a lame-o worship center (“If you want fellowship you do it in our own small group but keep that crap outta this building”) but we go there for complicated reasons. However my kids have choir and go to the mid-week Kidz Club (or whatever it’s called) at a different church where I drop them off at 6:45 and pick them back up at 8:00. I supposed I could drive home and back again during that time or patronize a bar but I’ve been kicked out of every bar in the tri-state area for telling lame dad jokes so that’s not an option. I had been seeing a room full of guys when I dropped off my kids so after Christmas I decided that I would interject myself into their club. And there’s nothing they can do to stop me! BWA! HA! HA!
So far I’ve attended eight classes and I think there about about ten more until summer. Because my wife found a statistic somewhere that it takes adult males 10-12 interactions of being around each other before any kind of friendship forms I figure I’m already two-thirds of the way to disappointment. I try to talk to at least one other guy each week but so far it’s not like anyone is approaching me after the study ends. There’s a core group of five or six that are there each week (which I guess includes myself) and an additional roving cast of ten or so who may or may not show up. It’s pretty obvious everyone knows everyone else and they all go to this church (big surprise there). It’s a decent sized church with two services so maybe they think I go to a different service than the one they attend. Maybe.
Monday, December 3, 2018
Tim Chandler and His Bands
Tim Chandler passed away almost two months ago. One of the admittedly selfish but immediate thoughts at learning of his death was “What does this mean for the music of The Choir and Daniel Amos?” Here are my thoughts on the issue.
Let’s look at The Choir first. I’ve gone into at length elsewhere how The Choir was instrumental in my early Christian walk, allowing me to see that I wasn’t alone in being imperfect and giving me lyrics deep enough to cause one to chew on them a bit. However here I’m just going to lay it out with no sugar coating. The Choir haven’t put out a good album since 2005. There. I’ve said it. I write album reviews for a local publication and always enjoyed being able to toot the horn of my pet bands but for the past few albums I decided not to write a review of The Choir. I mean, it’s one thing to gush over a band few have heard of in the hopes that they might gain a few more fans but it accomplishes nothing to write a negative review. Tim and I had been friends for about twenty years and he would call me after each release to ask my opinion, telling me that he appreciated my honest thoughts. I would tell him that songs I liked and why as well as what I didn’t. Sometimes it seemed that the lyrics seemed trite (at least for a band founded on poetry) but often it was that the songs just weren’t very strong or that the music seemed a bit light. It seems to me that for the past ten years or so Derri and Steve have been trying to muzzle Tim’s manic playing, lowering it in the mix or not letting him play as extravagantly as he felt the song might need. Sure, I understand why. Steve and Derri had tasted some small bit of success in the larger Christian music world and wanted to appeal to a larger audience (and pay some bills… I have no problem with that). However Tim was still interested in making art, another foundation of this once seminal band. It’s was often Tim’s deranged bass lines that took a simple “silly love song” and added tension. Consider “Flap Your Wings.” Without all of Tim’s noise and sonic destruction it’s just a slightly interesting introduction song. Other times Tim would play notes outside of the key of a song, often subliminally adding interest.
As further evidence of my theory is the recent acoustic version of Kissers and Killers. This was their most raucous, distorted album and Steve and Derri recently endeavored to make an acoustic version, stripping off all of the grit. Sure, it makes it easier to tour as a duo and gives an easy album release to sell, but it just feels to me like they’re trying to rewrite history.
So even if Tim was still alive, how much effect would he had been allowed to have on their next album? The horrible answer is that Tim wasn’t even officially a member of the band when he died. In very early July Tim called me because he had been kicked out of the band by Steve via text message. Tim was more incredulous than anything. There had been no meeting, no discussion, just a text message. Apparently Tim’s ex-wife said something that the source could only have been Steve so Tim called him out on it. Shortly thereafter, Tim was out. I don’t know more than that, though I have some speculations, and admittedly I only have one side of the story. I called Tim a month later to see how things were. This was the last time I ever talked to him. He and Steve and Derri and Dan were on friendly terms but he was not back in the band and Robin was going to play the gig in the fall. Who knows if the fences would have been mended by the recording of the next album so that Tim would even be playing on it?
Tim had expressed his frustration to me on a couple of events during the recording of Bloodshot and how the band wasn’t really reaching for the brass ring anymore. I remember him saying “There was a reason why I never jumped in the air and landed on my back with The Choir.” But he did do so with Daniel Amos.
I have less insights into Daniel Amos, mostly because they are not as active as The Choir so Tim didn’t talk as much about them. But what he did say was always positive, both about the music and the other members. I fear that the passing of Tim, however, means that Daniel Amos has also died. They have put out two albums in the past twenty years (one was a double album so let’s call that three) plus a Swirling Eddies release. Tim had been a member of DA since album number five and was an integral part of their sound. According to Terry, Tim pushed him to be more adventurous musically. If you’ve heard any of Terry’s Patreon recordings it’s easy to see that this is true. But to be fair, it’s true for everyone. What makes bands interesting are the blends of influences. Take one person out of the band as a solo artist and usually it’s pretty bland. The best example of this I heard was the Beatles song “Getting Better.” It’s a cheery McCartney song but Lennon adds just one line: “It couldn’t get much worse.” This one humorous, pessimistic line takes what would have been a saccharine ditty and makes it great.
So would Daniel Amos have made another album? There was always talk of doing another one. The fans were certainly there with their wallets open. My guess is that they probably would have done one more album before Terry or Ed got too old or had health issues. I mean, Terry is only sixty-eight but in his Patreon videos he doesn’t look overly robust. I know that might be taken as unkind, but the man is definitely slowing down and that’s okay. That’s normal.
That’s about all I have. I’ve had this blogpost rolling around in my head for quite a while and just had to get it out.
Monday, November 19, 2018
Rallys Eat-It-All #25: Bacontastic Burger and BBQ Bacon Cheese Fries
It's been a while, eh? However when Rally's puts up a sign that says "BACON FOR DAYS" I'm a moth to the flame.
Here's the Bacontastic Burger in all it's gloopy glory. A couple of strips -o- bacon and some bits of bacon and some cheese gloop AND a slice of cheese. What's not to love? Flavor-wise it's good but not mind blowing. The cheese goop is the problem... more goop than cheese.
And now... the end of the story.
Look at them. The BBQ Bacon Cheese Fries. They look good, don't they? And they tasted good. Going down. Not so good coming up. Four times.
You see, I went to Rally's during their off-peak time of freshness, approximately 2 PM. The employees are much less stressed than during the noon-time rush, when I normally visit. Apparently they are so relaxed that they don't care about washing their hands after using the restroom. I have a vague memory of having an upset tummy after visiting this same Rallys during off-peak hours in the past year but it was just that. This time was totally different.
I ate the burger on my walk back to work. The burger and the demonic fries have about the same ingredients so in all honesty it could have been either. But I blame the fries because as soon as I ate them they felt like a ball of goo in my stomach. And I knew I was in for some trouble. My body reacts quickly to food poisoning so within an hour I was starting to sweat and I visited the closest private restroom a couple of times, once even trying to make myself purge, something I've never done before. No luck. I was in this for the long haul. My fitbit tracker tells the story of my evening:
A is me walking willingly to my doom.
B is me walking as quickly to my car so that I could get home and lay down. In between A and B are the trips to the restroom, wondering when or if the horror would begin.
C, D, E and F and those horrors.
I'm still not sure exactly what item could have gone bad so quickly. These cheese sauce is an easy fall guy, but it was likely heated in a closed can with a pump. Which leaves the bacon. BACON! How could you turn against me, dear friend?
Which is all to say that I'm done with the Rally's Eat-It-All Series. There have been good times but now it must end. I will likely go back in the spring for their frozen deserts but certainly never again will I buy hot food from them after 1:00 PM.
And now... the end of the story.
You see, I went to Rally's during their off-peak time of freshness, approximately 2 PM. The employees are much less stressed than during the noon-time rush, when I normally visit. Apparently they are so relaxed that they don't care about washing their hands after using the restroom. I have a vague memory of having an upset tummy after visiting this same Rallys during off-peak hours in the past year but it was just that. This time was totally different.
I ate the burger on my walk back to work. The burger and the demonic fries have about the same ingredients so in all honesty it could have been either. But I blame the fries because as soon as I ate them they felt like a ball of goo in my stomach. And I knew I was in for some trouble. My body reacts quickly to food poisoning so within an hour I was starting to sweat and I visited the closest private restroom a couple of times, once even trying to make myself purge, something I've never done before. No luck. I was in this for the long haul. My fitbit tracker tells the story of my evening:
B is me walking as quickly to my car so that I could get home and lay down. In between A and B are the trips to the restroom, wondering when or if the horror would begin.
C, D, E and F and those horrors.
I'm still not sure exactly what item could have gone bad so quickly. These cheese sauce is an easy fall guy, but it was likely heated in a closed can with a pump. Which leaves the bacon. BACON! How could you turn against me, dear friend?
Which is all to say that I'm done with the Rally's Eat-It-All Series. There have been good times but now it must end. I will likely go back in the spring for their frozen deserts but certainly never again will I buy hot food from them after 1:00 PM.
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